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Throughout my life, I've always felt trapped. I felt like an outcast throughout all of my elementary years. Nobody wanted to be friends with me. I was the weird kid who sat alone at lunch.
In the 5th grade, I moved to a new school and the same exact thing happened. I had no friends there either and I hated every minute I was at that school. I think my parents noticed, because we moved back to our old house and my old school, but now I was in middle school instead of elementary school.
I didn't have high hopes for this school. I was an A,B student who never spoke, so I guess I was just used to everyone treating me like that.
Everything changed when I met my best friend. He was a friend when nobody else was. Thanks to him, my confidence and self esteem grew tremendously. The trapped feeling that had always had a grip over me all my life, was slowly losing its grip over me. By 7th grade, I was a brand new person.
Years ago, if you had asked me, this is not where I would have seen myself being. Now I make straight A's, always, and have a ton of friends but isn't how my story ends.
It is now 8th grade, and everything is a competition. Me and my best friend are always competing with each other for the top grades in the school. For the last 9 weeks I have made ALL A's!!!! People must be like. "That's not bad at all."
Well, I am still losing! My best friend is beating me even though I have a perfect score. The trapped feeling is returning to me slowly.
Every day I feel as though the weight of the world is going to come crashing down on me at any second. Although I know what the trapped feeling is now.
It's me knowing than no matter how hard I try I will always lose.
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