What panda does in a cafe

forever

A panda walks into a cafe. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the air.

"Why?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit.

The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder. "I'm a panda," he says, at the door.

"Look it up." The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an explanation...

"Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves."

ribot3

The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?"  Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"